Conquering Confidence: Your 3-Step System to Become an Unstoppable Coach

Josh Dykes

Let’s face it, confidence can be a tricky beast. One minute you’re feeling like a coaching rockstar, ready to empower your clients to world domination. The next, that pesky inner voice whispers, “Who are you to be a coach? You’re just a [insert self-deprecating job title here].”

Sound familiar? If you’re nodding along like a bobblehead at a motivational seminar (don’t worry, we’ve all been there), then this blog is for you.

Here’s the truth: confidence isn’t this magical thing that only a select few are born with. It’s a skill you can develop, just like learning that killer presentation you use to snag new clients. Buckle up, coaches, because we’re about to break down your confidence into a simple, three-step system that even your imposter syndrome won’t be able to resist.

Step 1: Ditch the Delusion of Perfection (and Embrace the Power of “Good Enough”)

Imagine this: you spend years meticulously crafting the perfect coaching programme or decide on your niche and how you want to help people as a coach. Every word is polished, every exercise is flawless. It’s a masterpiece, a symphony of self-improvement.

Now, here comes the kicker: you never launch it.

Why? Because the fear of imperfection paralyzes you. You convince yourself that you aren’t good enough, that someone out there is already doing it better. This, my friends, is the perfection trap, and it’s the enemy of confidence.

Here’s the antidote: embrace “good enough.”

Tim Ferriss, author of the ridiculously popular “The 4-Hour Workweek,” talks about this concept all the time. He emphasizes that “done is better than perfect.”

Think about it – would you rather have a perfectly polished programme gathering dust on your hard drive, or a “good enough” programme that’s actually helping clients transform their lives?

The answer is obvious, right? So, stop waiting for the magic moment when everything is perfect. Get your “good enough” program out there. You can always iterate and improve later. After all, your first draft doesn’t have to be the final masterpiece – it just needs to be a damn good start.

Step 2: Reframe Your Failures (Because Let’s Be Honest, Everyone Makes Mistakes)

We all mess up. It’s part of being human. But for some coaches (especially the confidence-challenged ones), a single misstep can feel like a coaching catastrophe.

Here’s the secret: failure isn’t a dead end, it’s a detour on your journey to becoming an awesome coach.

Remember that time you gave a client “meh” advice that didn’t quite hit the mark? Consider it a learning experience. Now you know what doesn’t work, which is just as valuable as knowing what does. This aligns with the concept of “embrace the suck” as discussed by Mark Manson in his book “The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F*ck.”

Here’s an even better way to reframe failure: turn it into a story. Like Tim Urban of Wait But Why fame, use your mistakes as hilarious anecdotes to connect with your clients and show them you’re human (and relatable).

Think about it: would you trust a coach who claims to have never made a mistake? Or would you be more drawn to someone who acknowledges their struggles and shares the lessons they learned along the way?

Exactly.

Step 3: Focus on Progress, Not Perfection (Because Tiny Wins Lead to Big Confidence Boosts)

Confidence thrives on accomplishment. Problem is, waiting for that one big win – landing your dream client, selling out your programme – can feel like waiting for a meteor shower while wearing a thimble. It’s frustrating and demotivating.

Here’s the solution: celebrate tiny wins. Did you finally finish that first draft of your e-book? Boom! Tiny win. Did you schedule a discovery call with a potential client? Woohoo! Tiny win.

These little victories might seem insignificant, but trust us, they add up. Oliver Burkeman, author of the fantastic “Four Thousand Weeks,” emphasises the importance of focusing on effort rather than outcome. Celebrate the effort you put in, and the results will eventually follow.

Tracking your progress is another great way to build confidence. Keep a “wins” list, a visual reminder of all the awesome things you’ve achieved, no matter how small. When that pesky imposter syndrome tries to rent space in your head, you can just pull out your list and say, “Nope, not today.”

Bonus Tip: Fake it ‘Til You Make It (But Do It With Integrity)

Okay, we know what you’re thinking: “But what if I don’t feel confident?”

Here’s a little secret: sometimes, you just gotta fake it ’til you make it.

Think of it like this: when you’re learning to ride a bike, you don’t wait until you’re perfectly balanced and confident before you start pedaling. You just jump on and hope for the best. And guess what? Eventually, you start to feel more and more confident.

The same goes for coaching. Sometimes, you have to act as if you’re already the confident, charismatic coach you aspire to be. Speak with conviction, maintain eye contact, and believe in your abilities, even if you’re secretly freaking out inside.

However, there’s a caveat: faking it ’til you make it doesn’t mean being dishonest or manipulative. It means projecting confidence while staying true to your values and authenticity.

Remember, your clients can spot a phony a mile away. So, be genuine, be yourself, and most importantly, be confident that you’re making a positive impact on their lives.

In Conclusion: Confidence is a Journey, Not a Destination

Building confidence is a process, not an overnight transformation. There will be setbacks, doubts, and even moments of self-doubt. But as long as you keep moving forward, one step at a time, you’ll eventually reach your destination: a confident, capable, and unstoppable coach.

So, embrace the journey, ditch the perfectionism, reframe your failures, celebrate your wins, and fake it ’til you make it (with integrity). With a little bit of effort and a whole lot of determination, you can conquer confidence and become the coaching rockstar you were always meant to be.

If you’re ready to overcome your limiting beliefs and become a successful coach, I encourage you to attend one of our 1-Day Coaching Diplomas to start your coaching journey. For those who want more speaking support, here is the link to our speaking training. It’ll help you to develop a plan to achieve your goals and build a successful coaching business.

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